They’ve often said “When you just know, you know”
or something like that.
How often do you listen to your intuition? How does it effect you?
For me, I know immediately what my instincts are trying to tell me. Usually it’s “get the fuck out of here” or “this is exactly where you need to be right now.” Of course, I do not believe in coincidences and I feel very strongly that we are all put somewhere for a reason. However, it’s what we do after we get there that we have to take the wheel out of destiny’s hands. It’s what we decide to do inside of our travels that really shapes the direction that our next step will take.
I learned something last night. I learned that sometimes you have to step out of your comfort level and shock yourself to appreciate what it is that you have and you love. I’ve learned this many of times, but sometimes that reminder feels like the initial moment and your hit with a slug to the stomach and a slap to the face…reality shouting at you to wake up.
I thought I was starting out the new year in a different way…one that would offer more means to money and a slight change of schedule with a second job. Instead, I started out the new year on a much more significant level. One where I realize that I have absolutely everything that I need to succeed, I just have to utilize it more creatively and effectively. I learned an important lesson about time management, appreciation for my talent, skill, education and intuition, but mostly, I learned that I could not have a more supportive and understanding teammate.
Come on, 2012. I knew it was going to be good, but now I’m ready to kick your ass.
So I guess this is where I’m supposed to turn introspective and reflect on the last year to somehow make the next year more promising.
This seems to be the only reason we divide our time in years. So we have excuses to repeat holidays and birthdays. So we can relentlessly create unachievable goals for ourselves because we can’t find a way to stop being so fucking lazy.
I’m in a constant state of self-reflection, so this day isn’t any different for me except for the fact that I could make a huge list of my year’s successes and abominations and watch it get lost in a sea of a million other lists.
Now, tonight, we’re all going to get really drunk, kiss someone at midnight or wish we could. We’ll swear to get that gym membership or tie up our running shoes, create a get-rich plan and promise ourselves that we’ll stop stuffing our face with fried chicken and french fries.
And then we’ll wake up the next morning and it will be just another day. We’ll skip right past our running shoes and throw on our slippers, run to the store with vomit in our hair and pick up some greasy grub to pacify our hangover. We wont remember who we kissed, and if we do, we’ll be disappointed. It probably wasn’t as magical as you planned it out to be in your head. In fact, it probably smelled staunchly of whiskey, champagne and cigarettes and you wound up with red lipstick smeared on both faces. Fucking romantic.
For a second, though, I’ll set aside my pessimism.
Because I wonder, if we didn’t have to start over every year, would progression be easier? If we didn’t falsely promise ourselves new beginnings every 365 days, maybe we would naturally find a way to create a stronger sense of advancement. A slower, more steady transition instead filling our lives with traffic lights of self-examination.
I guess some people just need a refreshment and I can not deny that I do too from time to time. A new year, a new hope?
